News & Events

Academic Seminar
"Alternative Scream Energies"
Wednesday at 3pm in LNO1138

Join adjunct faculty member Prof. Jowls Slimeston as he introduces you to the exciting new world of alternative scream energies that includes everything from harnessing the tears of animals to experimenting with odors secreted by terrified plants.

Slimeston’s research, dubbed “controversial and dangerous” by Monsters, Inc. CEO Henry Waternoose, has received praise from many government officials and members of the national small business community.

Remove the slime from your ears and open up your head (not literally) to a mind bending (literally) new world.